Why mediate? The benefits of family mediation

Family mediation can be a positive and effective way to resolve a range of family issues, including child arrangements and finances. Despite this, there are still misconceptions about how mediation works and what can be achieved through it.

What is mediation?

Family mediation is a type of Non-Court Dispute Resolution, which helps people come to an agreement or resolve an issue without making a court application.

With mediation, a trained and independent mediator helps separating or divorcing couples reach agreements on issues like child arrangements and finances as part of a separation or divorce, without the need to go to court. Mediation encourages open and conflict-free communication with the aim of finding mutually acceptable solutions for the family. A mediator can also explain how to make the agreement you reach legally binding, should you wish to do so.

There are several benefits of family mediation, and our family law solicitors will always recommend mediation if they think it’s suitable in your specific circumstances.

The law on mediation

In 2014, the law was amended to dissuade separating couples from applying directly to the family court if they cannot agree on financial separation and/or arrangements for their children. Couples must at least consider mediation before they can obtain a legally binding court order. More on this below.

What are the benefits of mediation?

• Mediation can be much quicker than going through court proceedings. From your first meeting (Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting or ‘MIAM’), it usually takes between three and five meetings to come to an agreement. Each session lasts about one to two hours.
• If you are eligible for Legal Aid, you may not have to pay for mediation.
• Mediation is non-confrontational. It gives you and your partner the opportunity to reach an amicable agreement together. For many, this is preferable to going before a court, during which a judgment will be imposed by a Judge who has little to no real understanding of your personal situation.
• If your case involves domestic abuse, you can still try mediation. Some mediators can offer ‘shuttle mediation’ where you and your ex-partner sit in separate rooms, and the mediator moves between you. In some cases, disputes can be resolved more quickly with mediation, without the need to face your abuser in court.
• As both parties have had equal input into what they’ve agreed, mediation gives you a sense of control and ownership to help you come to a more sustainable outcome.

Mediation is fundamentally about finding that ‘middle ground’ or the point at which you can both negotiate. This can be particularly useful when children are involved in the relationship, and you need to stay open-minded, whilst keeping the lines of communication clear.

Child Inclusive Mediation

Mediation isn’t just for separating adults. In cases involving child arrangements, a trained child mediator can talk to the child about what they would like to happen going forward.

Child Inclusive Mediation can be incredibly beneficial, especially when parents are struggling to figure out how to move forward, as a child will often speak openly and honestly in front of a mediator, i.e. without worrying about upsetting or disappointing their parent/s.

Read more about Child Inclusive Mediation here.

What happens if my ex-partner doesn’t agree to mediation?

If you haven’t already instructed a family law solicitor, it is important to do so. A specialist lawyer can help you fully understand your rights and options, ensuring you are supported and represented should court proceedings become necessary. They can also assist and advise you whilst you are attending mediation and help you make any agreement reached during mediation legally binding.

If your ex-partner refuses to mediate, the next step may be to start court proceedings.

MIAM meetings

The court will want to see that you tried to use mediation before you file a court application. This means both parties must attend a MIAM. During this, a mediator will explain your options and assess your suitability. If, during this session, one party still refuses to try mediation or the mediator feels mediation is not appropriate for you, they will provide you with a MIAM certificate, which you are required to send to the court with any court application.

Family mediation is not appropriate for all cases, and there are some exemptions that the court will accept. These include cases involving:

• Domestic abuse, where evidence can be provided
• A previous mediation or MIAM attempt
• Urgency: if there is a risk to life or safety, and the case needs to be dealt with quickly
• Social services involvement
• Existing court involvement
• Respondents who are in prison or subject to bail conditions
• One or both parties are living outside England or Wales
• Previous injunctions or orders, such as a Non-Molestation Order

Further information

If you believe that mediation would be effective for you in your separation, our family law solicitors can help. Although we do not offer family mediation, our team can put you in touch with a recommended mediator as part of your separation, divorce or child arrangements matter.

For friendly advice, call our family lawyers in Bristol on 0117 325 2929. Alternatively, complete our online enquiry form and a member of our team will get back to you.